Harry Donovan is an art forger who paints fake Rembrandt picture for $500,000. The girl he meets and gets into bed with in Paris, Marieke, turns out to be an arts expert Harry's clients are using to check the counterfeit picture he painted.

David Warner leads a band of modern day pirates who raid yachts and sail boats of people on vacation out in the Caribbean. Michael Caine is a reporter who goes out there with his son to investigate the mystery of the disappearing boats. He runs across Warner and his band of raiders and they decide to induct them into their tribe.

Charles Dreyfus escapes from the mental asylum and tries to kill Chief Inspector Jacques Clouseau. He doesn't succeed at first, so he takes on another strategy, namely to build a Doomsday machine and demand that someone else kills Jacques Clouseau, or Dreyfus will use the machine to wipe out whole cities and even whole countries... With about 22 assassins from all over the globe on his tail, Clouseau decides to find Dreyfus alone and put him back in the mental asylum.

Young nobleman Orlando is commanded by Queen Elizabeth I to stay forever young. Miraculously, he does just that. The film follows him as he moves through several centuries of British history, experiencing a variety of lives and relationships along the way, and even changing sex.

Lowly Gillingham Football Club are drawn against Premiership giants Newcastle United in the quarter finals of the FA Cup. A small group of 'Gills' fans decide to make the most of their 'game of a lifetime' by turning the journey north into a weekend away. On the eve of departure one of the group receives a visit from Terry, a man with no legs in a wheelchair, claiming he can get them a free minibus and free diesel. In return, all they have to do is take him with them!

The Football Factory is more than just a study of the English obsession with football violence, its about men looking for armies to join, wars to fight and places to belong. A forgotten culture of Anglo Saxon males fed up with being told they're not good enough and using thier fists as a drug they describe as being more potent than sex and drugs put together. Shot in documentery style with the energy and vibrancy of handheld, The Football Factory is frightingly real yet full of painful humour as the four characters extreme thoughts and actions unfold before us.